Friday 4 May 2012

What did you say your name was???

I know I've grouched about this before but I'm reiterating it (good word 'reiterating', makes me sound hedumecated huh?!)...I really have a problem with people who, in their blog profiles, describe themselves as something along the lines of :

an ultra-busy stay-at-home mom of seven children under the age of five (one set of triplets and two sets of twins),
wife to a fabulously supportive God-fearing man whose hobby is hoovering and cleaning, when he is not reading to or playing with his children,
daughter-in-law to the most gentle, kind and helpful woman the Good Lord ever made who is helpmeet to a wonder mechanic and handyman always ready to aid and assist his family,
owner of five dogs (two of them Great Danes), two horses, a cocktail of hens and five acres of landscaped gardens which are open to the public twelve months of the year.

She home schools the children, has an immaculate home which is regularly featured in 'Homes & Gardens' (or would that be Hello! magazine?), is renowned for her amazing twelve course meals (is there such a thing?), and all this without any home or garden help at all, except for her superfantabulous husband, of course.

In her spare time she crafts and quilts, and the blog is a diary of her daily creations, (oh did I mention that she was a well-known artist and photographer before her marriage and ascent into domestic blissitude?)
There then follows the most choc-a-bloc cyber gallery of increasingly fabulous and intricate workmanship- origami, Baltimore quilts, candle dipping, enamel work, wood-turning and pottery, (any one of which are good enough to be given to the Queen on her next birthday) which she dabbles at in her spare time...(all professionally photographed by herself in her own home studio).

AAAAARRRRRGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!Sour grapes? Moi?

And I think to myself, 'What a wonderful world!'

I'm going to go change my profile RIGHT NOW! Since I can't truthfully beat 'em or join 'em, I'll just have to be contrary!

3 comments:

Elaine said...

Too funny! But In the cyber world you can be anybody and anything you want. A profile like that is created by the same people who do those Christmas newsletters where so many fabulous things happen to them and their families. While there may be some grain of truth in the stories, I just don't buy them at all, and in all truth they make me want to gag. I do think they should be turning their hand to writing fiction though. I much prefer a profile like yours that is more truthful and entertaining.

Benta AtSLIKstitches said...

B.r.i.l.l.i.a.n.t! I love it! I feel the same way about these perfect husbands and children - not one girlfriend in my real life claims that, how come so many virtual people have the perfect ones? Thanks for the giggle!

Mamma Bears Fault said...

Oh how Lovely! Thank you for being REAL :)

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