Monday 24 June 2013

Do Your Dreams Need A Lifebelt?

I just came across this post about '21 Fears that will kill your dreams if you let them' by Sarah L. Webb.

Sometimes I read an article or post (same thing maybe?) and sit there thinking and wondering whether the writer opened an invisible window and read my thoughts? Of course, with age and experience come the realisation that most people share similar fears, but that never quite stops the initial jolt of recognition of oneself in a good piece of writing.

Have you ever wondered though, that if we are all afraid of similar things, how does anyone ever achieve anything? Someone told me recently that most people's lives are pretty bad but I just don't buy that. Everyone has troubles, granted, but not everyone has a really bad life. Lots of people are quite happy with their lives albeit perhaps wishing for more of the good things.
When I'm not battling overwhelming depression I am content enough with mine, even though people like to tell me what I should be doing and list all my mistakes and failings.

Heck, if that keeps them happy, go ahead, but I hope they won't mind if I don't listen...

One line I particularly like is: Unless your dream is to be a hermit, you have to work on getting comfortable with people looking at you. That I can soooo identify with.
Its an odd thing but there are many teachers out there who confidently work with a class of thirty  children all day every day for their entire working lives, but ask them to speak to a small group of adults and they run screaming. Its weird. I myself can teach in school and theatre, play the organ in Church, perform piano bar for hours to a shifting crowd but ask me to present a Craft Night to the Mother's Union and I'm in bits!

Still, read the article for yourself and see what you think- myself I can see plenty of lifebelts to grasp and float with! Its all grist to the mill of self-improvement and a life worth living!

Grouchy Grumbles

...people who fail to wipe the counter after snacking- detest mucky counters and table top...

...people who walk off and leave dirty coffee cups around my flat, the coffee table is ok, its localised...

...except when they dump dirty items on top of whatever I am working on, even if it IS on the coffee table.

...clean FOLDED laundry tumbled onto the floor...

...castaway shoes in the living room, kitchen, bathroom- the place for shoes is on the feet, under the bed or in the cupboard. Thank you.

...cold greasy washing up water left 'just in case.' I'd rather you threw it out, cleaned the bowl/sink and ran a fresh lot if you need to do more washing up...on the rare occasion you actually notice there is any to be done...

...wrappers of ANY description NOT in the bin- paranoid about rodents? Moi?


...dirty bathroom sink- how difficult is it to run the sponge around the sink when you are done? yes, that yellow and green item on the corner is 'the sponge' and you are welcome to use it anytime.


You can call me Groucho Marks in future- that way I'll get Marks for being Grouchy.

What was his mother thinking when she called him 'Groucho' anyway?...or was that a nickname- must look him up...Google-wise, I know he's dead thanks.

Grrrrr-ness.

Saturday 22 June 2013

Define....mishap?

One lunchtime last week a small boy sidled into my office.

'Mrs H., I've had an accident.'

'Oh dear. What sort? A plaster sort of accident?'

'Ummm no...more of a trouser sort of accident.'

Poor thing! He was quite embarrassed, so we went along to the second-hand uniform storage and found him another pair.

Problem solved.

But I thought his turn of phrase was most entertaining!

And later on he laughed too. He's that sort of little boy.

Thursday 20 June 2013

Proof of....

Hmmm, that last post kinda proves the diagnosis the doc has been trying to get into my thick skull, and another before him...

BipolarRUs...or is me..

Damn. Thought if I ran hard enough and fast enough I could slither out of that one.

Guess not.

To be informed is to come at problems from a position of power, a mon avis. So here's to a deluge of reading.

Any suggestions for info or websites will be gratefully receieved (but possibly not gracefully).

I know there are worse life sentences, much worse, but the rollercoaster seems bad enough to me sometimes...many times.

Sunday 16 June 2013

What If?

“Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions.
Small people always do that,
but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.”
Mark Twain
 
 
What do you think?
Does it seem to you that other people feel threatened by you and try to keep you down when your ideas get too big? Or when you have an idea at all.
How often are you stomped on 'for your own good'?
And they really do mean it to be for your own good because they don't want to see you hurt or disappointed. That I can see.
 
But what if the resulting hurt and disappointment are part of being you? Being alive? Taking chances? What if you are a chance taker and they are not? What if they don't understand that falling flat on your face is better than never trying to fly in the first place?
 
And even though they don't understand, none of them, is it ever alright for you to make a run for it and leap into the wide blue yonder? Especially since you never wanted them to pick up your pieces in the first place, that that was simply a role they appointed themselves?
 
Is it ever alright to take chances and break out of your box when no one understands why?
Is it necessary to try and explain? When do people stop trying to squish you into their shaped sort of person?
 
And what if you don't actually fail?



Thursday 6 June 2013

Plodding Along

Its Thursday and despite wading through the Slough of Despond this week, tomorrow is Friday...well, here in the West it is...and I feel like I may actually make it to the end of the week. Maybe. Last night was one of those mental 'hammer horror' nights when I wasn't sure I actually wanted to survive to tell the tale...actually the last several days and nights have been thus.

I've one particular friend who has a gift for texting at the blackest moments with a 'hang in there!' She feels helpless because that's all she can do but to me its huge. Sometimes just a text is enough to refocus the inward view.  Ewe are my sunshine!

This week has been warm and sunny, summer arrived suddenly and properly! Its just lovely to be warm and feel the sun on one's skin, and the children in school are so lively and happy too. A bit of sunshine makes all the difference in the world.

Youngest and Cohorts began their Leaving Cert. exams yesterday. So far ok, it seems. Thanks be!

So...TGIF tomorrow.

Sunday 2 June 2013

Organ Trouble...AGAIN

Picture Heckety staggering out of the Cathedral's Morning Service just now, wiping sweat from her brow and hiding behind the nearest gravestone to curse loud and long...(blue air)

During the second hymn (quite a short and innocuous hymn, 'Here is Love') with a grumbling rumbling reverberating moan the Organ took off on its own, in a completely different key to that in which I was playing, with the windy weighty discord becoming swiftly louder than my playing. Got to the last chord and I reached to turn it off before rising any of the stops.

It was HORRIBLE.

For the final hymn all that worked was about 18 notes on the upper manual, Middle C upward. No bass, harmonies, and only the shortest pipes, so really high-pitched and whistly. Also no pedals or volume increment. The Choir did a great job, also the Dean, but mortified? Much? Moi?

Next Sunday is the Enthronement of our New Bishop which is a real big deal in the life of the Church, so the Vestry has six days to get that bokety yoke of an instrument up and running.

Nice one, Organ.

Talk about a diva of an Organ, chooses its moments, always.

Aaaargh Grrrrr....


Mars bar solace called for...sssshhh...don't tell....
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

On a TOTALLY different note (ha ha) read this post about 'The Rooster of Mindfulness'- its ACE! I wish I'd real it before Church and then maybe I would have appreciated the moment and not got me knicks in such a twist?!

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