Sunday 26 January 2014

Cynical, Snarky, Moi?

Once upon a time there was a Princess and she fell in love with a Prince. Then another woman came along who also fancied the Prince so she charmed the pants off him, well not literally, with a magic potion, silly. So the Prince thought it was great having two dumb females after him and played it for all he was worth.

The Princess wept and wailed and gnashed her pearly white teeth and tried all sorts of ways to win back the Prince. He was too into himself to realise he was not just playing with fire, but also chucking away a diamond so he could play with Frosties.

One fine day, actually it was teeming with rain, the Princess blew her nose, squared her shoulders and thought 'stuff this for a game of thrones'. So she went out and found herself a big black friendly Labrador dog because they are the absolute best, travelled the world, became an eco-warrior, watched re-runs of Star-Trek every evening, wrote dozens of meaningful, inspirational, best-selling novels and had a merry old time. When she wanted company she visited a school and told the children stories about her travels, when she fancied a curry she ate out, and when she got fed up with life she went for a very long walk on the beach with her fabulous dog-person.

The Princess and her dog lived happily ever after and were loved by everyone.

The Prince settled for a boring half life of discontent, malaise and a whole string of greedy wives.

Actually, late in life the Princess may have found a quite ordinary kind man who loved her enough to take her as she was without playing stupid games, but then again that's her private business.

There is no moral to this story except if you watch the 'Mirror, Mirror' film in a bad mood, in which case you'll get the moral without it being explained.

Wednesday 22 January 2014

This'n'That

Yesterday I had a run-in with the Welfare Office and was so upset and annoyed I didn't know where to put myself. But then Wily Coyote took the time to phone and talk through a few ways of dealing with the problem, and Youngest joined me for a coffee in Costa, so I calmed down! This morning another friend came up with another suggestion so tomorrow I will go back to the Office and coolly, calmly deal with the situation.

Thank you for friends!

This morning in school I started working on musical 'rounds' with 1st and 2nd class, which took quite some explanation and practice before the concept was understood (I thought...). Eventually we managed to sing through the song as a round and got it to sound a bit more musical. They obviously still didn't understand the concept though because as I wound up that activity and began the next, one small boy told me in a puzzled voice: 'I still think its a very untidy way to sing.'

Thank you for honest little people!

Wednesday 15 January 2014

Helpful Heckety...Or Not So?

One day last week I thought I would be a helpful heckety and offered to collect a friend from a hospital appointment and deliver him home. He's a bit bockety on his feet so he requires door to door motorised delivery.

As regular visitors will know from my grumblings I keep the car at school and just walk up the hill and collect it when I need wheels. It takes about seven minutes so is not the least problem (when the sun is shining!!).

So last week, on the appointed day, at the appointed time (ish) I trotted along to the hospital to collect bockety friend and was zooming along the corridor thinking 'amn't I great for being on time, nay, early even?' when I realised...I'd forgotten...to collect the...car...

How does one collect someone without transport?

Piggyback?

No wonder I was early!

Back I ran to collect the car, drive to the hospital, park it and get to the correct department for collection of person. When I admitted what I'd done he laughed like anything.

Friends! who'd have me for one?

Sunday 5 January 2014

2014 Here I come?

What shall I do?
 
Where shall I go?

Who shall I be?

What are my options?

Decisions, decisions...

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