Girl: D'you know what my little sister did this morning, H.? She splouted the toothpaste straight into her mouth without even using her toothbrush! And then she drank the soap!
Well now we know who the cleanest child in Ireland is...on the inside at any rate!!
Teacher: You've Music after Break so leave your Song copy books ready please...(notices one boy frantically emptying bag and rummaging through pencil case)...what's the matter P.?
P.: I forgot to stick my song in!
Teacher: From last week? H. won't mind.
Whole Class: Yes she will, its from three weeks ago!
Aye me! My reputation!!
Rather Damp Boy: Dad had to wash my hair before school today.
R.D.B.: Because at breakfast my sister put her toast on my head butter side down.
And you let her??