Wrong Shop?

Last weekend I went clothes shopping with a friend in Dublin. He found a shirt he liked but all the trousers were wrong in some way so we went and had coffee instead.

On the way home I commented:

I don't understand why none of those trousers fit you right because you wear M&S trousers all the time.

He studied me a moment perplexed.

We were in Dunnes not M&S.

Ah.

Puzzle solved so!

Escape v. Perspective

Life never runs either smoothly or according to plan, does it? Neither physical life nor inward life. Often the two do not even run in tandem, and when outsiders think one is sailing through a calm, organised, 'together' patch, one's mind can be an utter battlefield of indecision, insecurity, demons, problem wrestling and the like, or vice versa. I suppose that is just as well as a calm outer shell gives one time to think, but would it not be just wonderful if outer calm matched inner certainty of purpose a bit more often?

And then there are the times when outer and inner lives are equally chaotic and it is difficult to keep hold of reality at all. Such has been my last few months, so naturally I ground to a halting heap of bleating ineptitude. Now I am wrestling a new bull having decided to apply to do a year's course in Dublin, applied, mark you, nothing definite...also no funding and nowhere to live- minor inconveniences, hmm?

One friend has several times pointed out that going to Dublin will not solve any problems, leaving all the mess of the marriage in one town whilst moving to another will not make it go away, or fix it, or end it: running does not help.

Another friend showed me an article by Oliver Burkeman which advocates distance and perspective as a means of getting to grips with problems. Well that's the gist of it. Her theory is the use of mental holiday mode in that getting away can make you see more clearly changes which need making, or worries which are unimportant, or even that maybe things are just fine as they are.

Which returns me to taking a year out to do a course in Dublin. I know that I need to sort things legally but I have to wait for other events to pass; I know that one piddly little course won't change my life; I know that finding somewhere I can afford to live in Dublin (rents are rocketing) is going to be a bother; funding for the course will also be a bother as will living expenses; and that solutions are worked at rather than arriving in blinding flashes.

But the alternative?

I have no job and no likelihood of a job as I have nothing to offer that a hundred young folk can't offer better and more cheaply (recessions voiding the attribute of experience over cheapness), I am well used to living on the smell of an oil rag, to say nothing of the wing and prayer method, and is it so bad to want to escape the judgement and censure of people here for leaving my marriage? I would like to be able to walk down a street unafraid to lift my eyes for fear of meeting someone who is not speaking to me and not afraid to cut me dead or make nasty comments to me. You think separation and divorce are acceptable in 21C modern world? Think again, my friends, they are not, well they are for men, but not for women it would seem...figure that at your leisure...

So is distancing oneself to gain perspective a different concept to running away? I suppose it depends upon whether one returns to act on any insight one may have gained and for that only time may tell. Is running away from unpleasantness any way to solve a problem? They who judge have made their attitudes my problem, I never asked them to take sides and indeed they know nothing of my situation since I am not prepared to demean myself by broadcasting details. Being a 'nobody' in a large city for a while would surely be a mental holiday from being a 'wicked female' in a small town and give me headspace to decide what is important and what is not.

Although Ireland being what it is, no one is ever a 'nobody' for more than five minutes! Island life, I ask ya!

So, sorry about the bitchfest, I do generally attempt to keep posts bitch-free but I get so tired of being the wicked one and trying to hold my head up. I think I need a break from living, pity one can't do that...

A Day In Dublin

On Thursday I took my life in my hands and ventured on a trip to the Grand Metropolis of Dublin City!

Haven't been in a while as the last time I went I freaked out the whole way there, all day and the whole way home...you'd have thought I was crossing the Gobi or the Amazon Jungle at the very least the way my heart was pounding.

Anyhow on Thursday I decided to bribe myself with an Exhibition of historical, rarely seen books at the Royal Irish Academy, as a means of overcoming the fear of crossing the Shannon. I told Eldest and she offered to meet me and bribe me further with a double latte soya chai! She and Wily Coyote spent most of the day with me, doing the exhibition and lunch before we went our separate ways.



Royal Irish Academy, Dawson Street, Dublin.
 

The perfect tea shop? Wicklow St., Dublin.

Dublin Castle.

 After lunch I went to the Chester Beatty Library which is in behind Dublin Castle and on the way back down Dame Street got caught in a hail storm. I do love walking around, so much to see, buildings, history, memories...what's not to like? I did a loop through Trinity College on the way back to Busarus but was too late to get into the Library there: three libraries in one day might have been overkill though!

So anyhow, it was an achievement, for me.

Stephen's Green photos, Dublin

So here are some not very good photos from last week! This is part of the band I came across outside the Thrater...and below is the pond in Stephen's Green.

James Joyce, a bit o' culture fer ye...
and another Bandstand! Hey! I like Bandstands- they are so old-fashioned!
...and ditto...
I'll take some more this week and h-edu-macate yez further!!

Pickles and Patience

I know I've asked this before, but do any families sail serenely through their combined lives, or do all families lurch from pickle to disaster, with 'a series of unfortunate events' en route?

Seriously, I would really like to know.

The latest in this establishment, in case you are at all interested, is Eldest grinding to a halt...just two months before her Degree Finals. Her Dissertation isn't written, also a 90 minute play, and two short essays, and there's a small matter of two 'set' designs (theater mock-ups, basically) to make.

All to be done and dusted by 10th April, followed by viva voce exams and some other final 'stuff'.

Her arthritis and joint pain is very bad, she can't do steps, or sitting or standing for any length of time, or type for very long, or keep food, and a host of other ailments, or even walk properly with a stick...in fact she's in far worse physical case than my own father, who is no sprung chuck.


HOO BOY!

So she came home at the weekend (by persuasion since I had eight 16 yr olds staying- another story!) and she, Middlest and I sorted out a schedule for the next month so that Eldest has company/minder at all times.

I tell you, God does work in mysterious ways, because Middlest is only semi employed at present and is able to help out. Between her and I someone can always be available for Youngest in the evenings, and still get to Dublin for Eldest. If Middlest's plans had gone as planned (brilliant English language, I know!!) she would not be available to help and I would be beside myself.
(The Hub's work hours are difficult at the best of times, and he begins his Course at the Church of Ireland College in Dublin this weekend- different place to Eldest...of course!-and another story!!)

So tomorrow evening I am heading to Dublin on the BladeRunner (as in slow-country-stop-at-every-blade-of-grass-between-here-and-Dublin bus!!) It takes 4 1/2 hours, would you believe? (2 1/2 to drive oneself!) since due to cutbacks they have abolished the Express Bus...you don't realise what an enormous country Ireland really is until you try to cross it using public transport!!

But I was just thinking this morning, as I added to my list of things to do by tomorrow, that, considering I do nothing, its pretty complicated putting life on 'hold' for a month. Obviously, to do nothing as well as I do takes a lot of organisation!

This is Heckety Beck coming to you from County Leitrim for the latest Blogger News update!

Here and There

This morning I was in school working with the little people- I forget how wriggly they are, and how short their attention span. Still it was useful, and fun to hear how their songs are coming along. Dilly has come home from Dublin for two nights which is lovely. B has a rotten cold after being out late last night singing in a public Concert with the School Choir, and Sos has gone to Dublin for the night with friends to see one of the Ibsen plays she is studying. My folks are in Dublin as Dad is going to the Rugby International with my bro, who is visiting from London for two nights and staying with a sister, unless they fall out! It sounds like one of those long-winded jokes where everyone ends up somewhere else!

Thankful Thursday...oops! it's Friday!

Thou hast given so much to me,

Give one thing more- a grateful heart;

Not thankful when it pleaseth me,

As if thy blessings had spare days,

But such a heart whose pulse may be

Thy praise. (George Herbert.)



Yesterday I went to Dublin for the day with Mum, to visit the Knitting and Stitching Show at the RDS, which is why Thankful Thursday is late! So, first my 'Thankfuls' and then my 'Yesterday'!



1. Thankful that last week with the Ma-in -law went so well and I think she had just as good a time as us.



2. Thankful I have managed to catch up on the weariness as well as the chores this week, and am feeling more able for the next half of term and the School and Church music run-up to Christmas.



3. Thankful that the Hub's workplace has lifted the ban on overtime so that he can catch up on all the engineering maintenance as well as accumulated bills, and order oil for us this winter. God's perfect timing AGAIN people!!!



4.Thankful that on Wednesday two lovely things happened:- a friend arrived with a load of eggs (http://heartwarmingtreasures.blogspot.com/2009/10/country-saying.html), and then Mom brought her God-daughter to visit my quilt frame so she could figure how to do a similar home-made article. Both those visitors are great people and it was up-lifting to catch up with them and their family newses!



5.Thankful that I got the gumption to start selling my sewings on ebay.ie. It took me three 'go's' of at least two hours each to upload the first item, but finally I got it sorted, and I am hoping to upload some more bags as well as three lap quilts when I've finished writing to y'all! Some extra dosh would be nice, but also I think I need to achieve this for my own self-esteem, if that doesn't sound too corny? Anyhow, first bag here: http://cgi.ebay.ie/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=170400277861&ssPageName=STRK:MESELX:IT! (As you can see,links are my strong point!)



6. (Afraid I just gotta keep going here...) Thankful Sos and Dilly had a good time together in Dublin this week and they were kept safe from harm- God minds 'airheads' too!

7. Thankful that, although B wants a Hallowe'en Party, she wants a traditional one with a 'Torch Walk' down the lane through the mud and flooded Trickle, a campfire with melted marshmallows, a Barm Breac with tokens and story-telling. Dirty, wet and great fun, no 'nasties'. I dislike the ghosties and ghouls aspect and I am thankful she chose this alternative herself.

8. And the last one; thankful that Mum and I had a lovely day yesterday in Dublin!

We went up on the first train which left at 8.30am, but was really as bus as far as Dromod as they are replacing the bridge across the Shannon. After Mullingar the train was packed as I guess lots of folks fancied a day out! We got the Dart across to Ballsbridge and walked to the RDS (Royal Dublin Society) where we met friends of Mum and had lunch in the Club Members Lounge. It is the most glorious old building and besides that, holds memories for me of being taken there as a child by my Grandmother.



At about 2.30 we finally hit the Show (I thought the grown-ups would never stop talking and get on!), so here are a few photos for your interest:



I was very restrained in my purchases!

Some of the Irish Patchwork Society's exhibits, the theme was 'Journeys'.

This one was stunning, and my photo doesn't do it justice: An overview from the upper gallery, its a pretty old hall, Victorian perhaps? Big enough but not huge like a modern Convention Center, so the aisles are a bit narrow and a lot is crammed in.

After a cuppa tea we got the bus into town for some Department Store browsing and price checks (as in 'Who'd pay that?', 'Ye Gods!'-one of Mum's favourites, '239 euro for THAT?', 'Not bad for a 37 piece Dinner Service, but what are the extra seven pieces?', 'Aren't they cute but I wouldn't want it in my house!'...get the drift?), snacks for the train and a newspaper. Then the Luas back to Connolly Station in the lamp-lit city where we had another cup of tea/coffee and I chatted to a guy carrying a double bass as I remember the days well when I carted my 'bass around and received all the stick- 'big violin, does it fit under your chin?' and 'did your guitar grow?' being the two main ones. I heard someone saying the identical things to this guy which is why I stopped to chat.

Then the last train (and bus) back to Sligo where we were met by the relevant husbands and home just before 11pm.

It was a nice day out, a pleasant break in routine. Sos returned from Dublin on an earlier bus, gathered two friends and headed out on the raz. There appear to be three cocoons on the sitting room floor this morning so I guess its them? And B had a quiet day at home until the Hub returned from his shift and dragged her out to shop for supper...pizzas, despite there being plenty to eat in the fridge and cupboards! Typical Dad! Mine would do the same!