Cleaning?? Oh! Cleaning!

You know its long gone time to clean when:

The dust Bunnies are having grandchildren

Spiders on the window ledges don’t just roll over and play dead; they turn their back on you and keep spinning

The house plants have cobwebs

There’s mould growing on the shoe pile at the bottom of the stairs

Even the cobwebs are dusty

The yoghurt pot of nettle tips you picked and brought in a few weeks ago to keep the flies away have grown to nearly 8” tall- on the dregs of the rinsed out yoghurt?

The dogs have run off with the floor rugs so many times that even they have forgotten where they are

The potted ivy has grown over and completely obscured the vacuum cleaner- ah shame!

You’ve lost the best tablecloth and it isn’t until you clear the dining table of accumulated leftover homework and end of term school projects that you discover the table cloth has been there all the time

You can’t remember the colour of the bedroom carpet

You have to lift the lid of the goldfish tank to check whether the fish are still inside because you can’t see through the glass for green algae- scrap this, the goldfish have cleaned up the glass themselves…its amazing what can be achieved with a bit of windolene and a chamois cloth, even when you’re a fish

The utility room is unusable due to the amount of re-cycling waiting to be taken to the quays

you could have sworn there were five humans and two dogs living in the house with you but you haven’t seen a soul for weeks now…

You decide to go stay with your sister for a week to get away from it all…and you can’t find the front door to leave...

Permission to Panic, Sir!

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Another story- ‘Summers in France’.
Anyone remember Corporal Jones from 'Dad's Army'?
When there was a crisis he ran around like a headless chicken shouting 'Don't panic, don't panic!'
Occasionally this changed ad he'd demand of Captain Mannering, 'Permission to panic, Sir!'

What do you do when someone potentially important to your husband's future asks if he and his wife can come to tea and interview the Hub in your house? Taking into consideration the fact I haven't had a huge clean and tidy since before Christmas, and that the last six weeks I've been crafting, knitting, sewing and there's stuff everywhere?

I panic
You panic
He/She panics
We panic
Ye panic
They panic.

Then you take time out to blog!

Then I clean and tidy like a demented spinning top!

Woman of Mighty Chores!

Is it just my house or do other people have VERY industrious spiders?

This morning I hoovered the ceiling of the back kitchen and it took me for ever to get all the cobwebs...I didn't take a photo as I was mortified at the state of it. When I told my Mom she asked if that was the first time I'd ever cleaned it- the cheek! I clean the ceiling about every few months (since it doesn't generally get walked on).

Then I cleared and cleaned the counter:
As you can see, even the Hallowe'en decorations needed to be put away. I also rearranged it so that snacks can be had back there instead of endless trails of crumbs to the kitchen table and back. I tell you Hansel and Gretel would have had a field day in this house with all the breadcrumbs!

Then I put together a casserole for tonight and put it in the Rayburn on 'low' to slow-cook and heat the kitchen... Then I cleared the counter top on the dresser, cleaned and waxed it, and put all my cookery books there instead of on the window ledge.
I know one shouldn't be obsessed with 'things' but I do so like my kitchen dresser.

I was outside washing the windows when the farmer from below walked past with a bundle of hay on his back. When he saw me he laughed; 'Is this the day to be doing that, Missus?'

I said that since there was no wind, no sleet, rain, hail or snow falling and the sun was shining out of a blue sky, what better day? The temperature was sub-zero, but so? He is now convinced (as if he needed it) that I'm barmy!

The hall is warm as anything with the sun streaming through the windows, it really is a beautiful day even though the frost hasn't yet melted (4 pm).So now,with a beautifully clean and tidy kitchen and back kitchen...I will propound my philosophy on household chores:

'Why waste time cleaning when you can hardly see the dirt?'

I'll leave you to mull over that nugget of wisdom.