Tuesday, 6 July 2010

Cleaning?? Oh! Cleaning!

You know its long gone time to clean when:

The dust Bunnies are having grandchildren

Spiders on the window ledges don’t just roll over and play dead; they turn their back on you and keep spinning

The house plants have cobwebs

There’s mould growing on the shoe pile at the bottom of the stairs

Even the cobwebs are dusty

The yoghurt pot of nettle tips you picked and brought in a few weeks ago to keep the flies away have grown to nearly 8” tall- on the dregs of the rinsed out yoghurt?

The dogs have run off with the floor rugs so many times that even they have forgotten where they are

The potted ivy has grown over and completely obscured the vacuum cleaner- ah shame!

You’ve lost the best tablecloth and it isn’t until you clear the dining table of accumulated leftover homework and end of term school projects that you discover the table cloth has been there all the time

You can’t remember the colour of the bedroom carpet

You have to lift the lid of the goldfish tank to check whether the fish are still inside because you can’t see through the glass for green algae- scrap this, the goldfish have cleaned up the glass themselves…its amazing what can be achieved with a bit of windolene and a chamois cloth, even when you’re a fish

The utility room is unusable due to the amount of re-cycling waiting to be taken to the quays

you could have sworn there were five humans and two dogs living in the house with you but you haven’t seen a soul for weeks now…

You decide to go stay with your sister for a week to get away from it all…and you can’t find the front door to leave...

9 comments:

Amanda said...

I can't believe it's quite that bad, though I do remember how satisfying it was to clean up during the school holidays, because you could really see the results and everyone remarked on how nice the house looked! Do nettles really keep the flies away? I hope you don't lose your computer under the ironing pile, or your phone under the shopping that hasn't quite been put away yet, or your sewing under the piled up newspapers ..... (yes, I've been there too).

Ulla said...

I thought you had been spying in my upstairs rooms until you wrote about dogs and fish - we don't have such things. Good luck with the project.

Heart2Heart said...

I love this post! I've finally got around to do some things that have been sitting for quite some time. I hate dust bunnies too, seems like when your pets are shedding the multiply so much quicker.

Love and Hugs ~ Kat

Griselda Pugh said...

We don't have goldfish, and we have three humans and one cat, but otherwise everything sounds the same!! Cleaning isn't so bad, it's the starting to clean that I find difficult :(

Robin said...

Oh dear, I think you've been visiting my house! (Well except for the fish, we killed those ages ago.)

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Hazel said...

I love this post! We had a massive spring clean this weekend (in the middle of winter!!) and now the house is literally sparkling and I am beside myself... I just wish it would stay this way for a change! :) Hazel

Postcards from Wildwood said...

I am SO not letting my younger son see this post. It would give him way too many ideas for how to progress his natural laissez faire approach to household cleanliness.
But now really, Heckety, I'm sure your house is not as bad as all that...!!!!

ladydi said...

The thing about waiting far too long to do something is that it makes such a very noticeable difference when you finally do! I finally went to the recycling center yesterday, and we now have an additional 6 square feet of floor space in our porch. Don't worry, someone will fill it up. :>}

Trishia said...

heckety, i can't believe i have been away so long....I need to find a subscribe button so you come straight to my mail box:) thank you for some laughter today!

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