Cynical, Snarky, Moi?

Once upon a time there was a Princess and she fell in love with a Prince. Then another woman came along who also fancied the Prince so she charmed the pants off him, well not literally, with a magic potion, silly. So the Prince thought it was great having two dumb females after him and played it for all he was worth.

The Princess wept and wailed and gnashed her pearly white teeth and tried all sorts of ways to win back the Prince. He was too into himself to realise he was not just playing with fire, but also chucking away a diamond so he could play with Frosties.

One fine day, actually it was teeming with rain, the Princess blew her nose, squared her shoulders and thought 'stuff this for a game of thrones'. So she went out and found herself a big black friendly Labrador dog because they are the absolute best, travelled the world, became an eco-warrior, watched re-runs of Star-Trek every evening, wrote dozens of meaningful, inspirational, best-selling novels and had a merry old time. When she wanted company she visited a school and told the children stories about her travels, when she fancied a curry she ate out, and when she got fed up with life she went for a very long walk on the beach with her fabulous dog-person.

The Princess and her dog lived happily ever after and were loved by everyone.

The Prince settled for a boring half life of discontent, malaise and a whole string of greedy wives.

Actually, late in life the Princess may have found a quite ordinary kind man who loved her enough to take her as she was without playing stupid games, but then again that's her private business.

There is no moral to this story except if you watch the 'Mirror, Mirror' film in a bad mood, in which case you'll get the moral without it being explained.

This'n'That

Yesterday I had a run-in with the Welfare Office and was so upset and annoyed I didn't know where to put myself. But then Wily Coyote took the time to phone and talk through a few ways of dealing with the problem, and Youngest joined me for a coffee in Costa, so I calmed down! This morning another friend came up with another suggestion so tomorrow I will go back to the Office and coolly, calmly deal with the situation.

Thank you for friends!

This morning in school I started working on musical 'rounds' with 1st and 2nd class, which took quite some explanation and practice before the concept was understood (I thought...). Eventually we managed to sing through the song as a round and got it to sound a bit more musical. They obviously still didn't understand the concept though because as I wound up that activity and began the next, one small boy told me in a puzzled voice: 'I still think its a very untidy way to sing.'

Thank you for honest little people!

Helpful Heckety...Or Not So?

One day last week I thought I would be a helpful heckety and offered to collect a friend from a hospital appointment and deliver him home. He's a bit bockety on his feet so he requires door to door motorised delivery.

As regular visitors will know from my grumblings I keep the car at school and just walk up the hill and collect it when I need wheels. It takes about seven minutes so is not the least problem (when the sun is shining!!).

So last week, on the appointed day, at the appointed time (ish) I trotted along to the hospital to collect bockety friend and was zooming along the corridor thinking 'amn't I great for being on time, nay, early even?' when I realised...I'd forgotten...to collect the...car...

How does one collect someone without transport?

Piggyback?

No wonder I was early!

Back I ran to collect the car, drive to the hospital, park it and get to the correct department for collection of person. When I admitted what I'd done he laughed like anything.

Friends! who'd have me for one?

2014 Here I come?

What shall I do?

 

Where shall I go?

Who shall I be?

What are my options?

Decisions, decisions...

Wanted: Camels

If the Magi had advertised for camels before they set out on the journey to Bethlehem, how do you think they might have phrased their ad?

Wanted:

Sturdy Camels With Inbuilt Astral Tracking GPS.

Duration of Journey: Unknown.

Destination: Unknown.

Project Sponsor: Yahweh, God of the Jews.

Purpose: Greatest PR Event in History.

Hmmm....Any better ideas?

And just for thought, one of my favourite poems: The Journey of the Magi. (TS Elliot)

Back to Bethlehem

Well you'll be glad to know that the Heavenly Host came up to scratch on Friday! They sung their hearts out and presented the Nativity most resoundingly. I was/am really happy with them. The organist played with gusto and managed to cover up most excellently the children's and my glitches- I do really like working with him! The guitarist and flautist seemed to have fun too though they looked as wrung out as the organist and I felt. Wrung out and slightly hysterical actually...

The congregational hymns turned out rather antiphonally as one half of the church speeded up and overtook the organ, twice. Fanblinkintastic.

So school carols are done for another year.

And now I'm crouched over the laptop with You Tube and Bible Gateway sites open on several tabs, three hymn books, a Bible and a notebook open on the surrounding desk, trying to put together the Church Carol Service for next Sunday evening. I've lined up two soloists, the Sunday School teacher has wrestled the children into order for the Nativity, the Church is being decorated on Friday, so progress is being made. Now I've just to get the right hymns to go with each of the Nine Lessons.

I know its not everyone's opinion, but sometimes I feel that our Services have become so child-friendly and banal that we have lost the pure incredulity...incredibleness (??) of Christmas. Jesus isn't a doll dropped on its head and squashed into a toy cot face down, Jesus is God's Very Own Son. The children are important, and their understanding of the Christmas Story is essential, but there should still be space for amazement and respect and just good old-fashioned AWE. And children do love atmosphere and candlelight and favourite songs. Can I put 'magic' and 'Church' in the same sentence?

Well, that's my aim for next Sunday evening.

Little People, Heavenly Host and Music

Did I disappear? Wish I could as for a supposedly unemployed person of insignificance I seem to be beyond busy.

The main focus this week, and last week, but not the week before, is the school's Carol Service. Big eejit here overstretched herself somewhat in the choice of this year's music and the children and I have struggled to work our way through the Nativity songs. The teachers say it is sounding ok now but I think we will all be grey by Friday- I'm talking Junior Infants upwards here...

This morning I spent some time in the Church with the Organist (long-suffering man) and the bass guitarist (who is having far too much fun), over two hundred weary and over-excited small people, the Principal and all their teachers. I really don't know how it's going to pan out as the little people are wildly unpredictable, the heavenly host are having dodgy moments, Gabriel temporarily muddled his words and Michelangelo put his hoodie on back to front with the hood up, to hide...

We'll see.

Implosion pending, tunefully and musically, of course.

The Shop was quieter the last two Mondays, and on Saturday I wound up the children's sewing classes until mid-January. There seem to be eleven children now in the Sewing Club but as they never all turn up at one time it is do-able. Its been a fun but tough learning curve for me as well as them, since teaching outside school is vastly different to school teaching. Or that's my experience.

The Sunday school teacher has rounded up sixteen small people for the Church Nativity, and has her hands very full I think...putting the Church Carol Service together might be the next thing on my 'to do' list...I talked to the adult Choir last Sunday so we will begin by doing a number on 'Once in Royal' and then progress to doing a number on the Nativity Story. I say every year that our God must have an incredible sense of humour considering all the many ways in which the Christmas Story is told...and I'm saying it again this year.

Think of us on Friday at 10am...then again, you may actually hear us...