Hole In Wall

Right this minute there is a hole in my sitting room wall. Panic not, people, it goes up, before out. When I left the house early yesterday evening the landlord was perched on top of the chimney mildly cursing...as landlords do?

You want the story?

Installation of a closed stove. Pending installation? Potential installation?

Some of you will know that its a rather old (in places dodgy) cottage I live in, so it will surprise you not at all to learn that the installation was not progressing as hoped.

The plumber, referred to as 'yon fella' by the landlord,R, arrived yesterday about 2 o'clock and within 30 minutes had  the carpet rolled back, furniture moved (myself having emptied the room of sundries last Wednesday when Yon Fella was first expected), ripped out the 1950's? '60's? fireplace surround and were navigating around the piano with barrow loads of shovelled rubble and debris. Next the  back boiler was dismantled and hauled out, soot and substantial trickles of water all across the floor. Luckily there's no foundation so I guess most of it just soaked into the ground between the tiles.

I will post photos when it is done, because the remains of the original fireplace which emerged were quite interesting, typical 18th C rural Irish, which is appropriate to what I know of the house.

Apparently the chimney has to have a 'liner' inserted, so next thing R. is strolling around the roof with the QE2 on his shoulder...actually its more of a long metal bendy tube which had to be slid down the chimney, with a rope attached to the end so that it could be pulled from below in case difficulty arose, which of course it did.

A sample of the conversation being yelled between Yon Fella, crouched in the fireplace with his head up the chimney, and R. sitting atop the chimney:

YF: Let it down easy now, I've the rope, twist it as ye go.

R: Can ya see it? I've a good part down.

YF: (tugs on the rope) Not a bit. Would there be a kink in this chimney?

R: There could be anything in this chimney for all I know. Have ye got it yet?

YF: (tugs again) Nope. Can ye see anything?

R: I'd say it was relined recently, its definitely not the original chimney.

YF: Recently?

R: 20's maybe, good strong brick. (no body asked 'which '20's?' 17s?18s?19s?) Throw me up another bit of the ould tape till I try something.

YF: (goes out to van, rummages, tells me to duck and fires a roll of tape onto the roof which R catches) How can ye not know which way the chimney goes?

R: Was I here when they built the damn thing? Try now...

At which point I unfortunately had to leave, but I expect my absence freed up their language which probably expedited success. By the time I returned last night the lining was through and various  cementings had been done, the water had gone and there were no dead or wedged bodies that I could see.

And that, dear readers is how it stands. No sign of them this morning but sure its early yet for Yon Fella to be about. I swear R will have him murdered before the job is done. Like many plumbers round here he is as unreliable as an Irish Summer but just as pleasant when he finally arrives.

Heckeva Week...

You know the sort of week when you wonder what else could go wrong?

Present concatenation of disaster:

parking fine
house sold, discovered by accident, can't get answer as to when I have to leave but soon
car broke down...twice, rent money used for repairs
subzero temperatures again and house heating not yet repaired, landlord not accepting my calls
front door slammed locking me out
flat stony broke
got mad with my Principal and resigned....
....he shredded my letter, isn't it SO ANNOYING when your friends know you better than you know yourself?

Then this afternoon a friend rang me up and said 'Come around right now for tea.' I was so thankful and grateful to her. Her husband cooked supper too before I had to return to school to do some work with the book-keeper on the accounts, soooo nice.

And THEN, listen to this, a lady in the queue behind me at the supermarket passed me a €10 off voucher which she said she didn't want when I was checking out! I'm telling you I nearly cried from gratitude...wasn't that just the kindest thing?

Bless You!!

I am so blessed in my cyber-buddies, so very blessed. You are all so good to write and send me your thoughts and also that some of you too have passed through this valley on your journey. I am humbled and begin to think that I may survive too. You are so encouraging.

Friends at school and around have been kind too, some really making the effort to remind me that they care. That too is encouraging.

I have hidden for the last month, afraid to be seen for fear of verbal abuse. Its been difficult and not just due to the demons in my head. Whatever other people are thinking, I think I am judging myself the most harshly of all since it does seem to me a wicked thing to have walked away from my marriage. And although the girls are free to visit me whenever they please, they continue to live with their father. From full time Mom to a few hours a week with each girl, if I'm lucky, is an overwhelming loss...of companionship and identity. I tell myself that it is early onset 'empty nest' syndrome!!!

I will take photos of my funny little house to show you.

Its over one hundred years old, with an outside loo and, in the back shed, the old yard fireplace for cooking! Its very narrow, maybe 8' wide, and shaped like a boomerang with hardly a square corner in the place. The fire heats the radiators and the hot water- no fire, no heat. There are three plug sockets upstairs, two in the sitting room and I thought there were three in the kitchen but then I found two more in a cupboard...so if I want to plug in something extra I have to use it in the cupboard and sit on the floor...

Eccentric in the extreme!!

21st Century Howarya...

Yesterday I learnt something new, and not good 'new' either.

It seems that even in 21st Century Ireland if a wife is in an unhappy marriage her options are very limited. If she stays for the good of her children until they 16 years or older, the husband is only duty bound to support the children until they have finished full-time education, and owes the wife nothing at all financially. If the husband refuses to vacate the family home she must take him to court if she wishes him to leave and she to stay, and that case would likely only be won if there is extreme violence involved and she is in fear of her life.

If she decides to leave the family home the husband cannot dispose of the home without her consent, and vise versa. If it is sold they each get half the proceeds, if, in the current economic climate it could be sold.

There are no state benefits for a woman who leaves, so she'd jolly well better be able to support herself. She may claim 'job seekers allowance' once she has a separate address to the husband, but not before. Catch 22 situation.

The children would remain with the parent with the greater income, usually the father.

So in the end a wife gives herself to bringing up her children and keeping the home, the husband takes all her salary (whenever she is earning) and the wife ends up penniless, and, if the marriage comes adrift, homeless. What's more, the husband retains the moral high ground by not leaving the family home and continuing to support his children.

The moral of this story, dear ladies, is to either live in sin or not to put up with a lousy marriage for the sake of the children, get out early.

I totally agree that it should not be easy to walk away from one's Marriage vows, they were taken in all seriousness and in good faith.  And who on earth ever thinks at the start of a marriage that they'll end up separated or as a negative statistic? But heck- should a woman be punished for having done the right thing by her family but finally refusing to take any more **** ?

Basically, ladies, not only have we no rights, we're scuppered.

Thankful Thursday back again!

'In all things give thanks.'

Here's a funny to start: Last night I was seasoning the soup for supper when the top flew off the jar of chillies. There wasn't much I could do so I added a few more potatoes and hoped for the best...served it...and...my family had their heads blown off! Aaagh! We are still in orbit, and that's from one spoonful each!
So if you hear tell of a nuclear incident in the west of Ireland it was just me making supper!

And now for this week's thankfuls- I've struggled a bit to find five since the week has come hard to me:

1. Thankful there's been no damage to the house after two storms this week. At the weekend the winds were blowing gale force ten apparently.

2. Thankful the school children are excited about starting the Nativity songs. They are so 'into' it they have organised their music themselves and are even excited about learning song-words for homework! Miracles do happen!

3. Thankful for a weather-proof, warm and comfortable house to live in. It hasn't always been so for us so we are all so thankful for the comfort.

4. Thankful for several bids on the eBay items I've made. That may sound silly but it matters to me.

5. Thankful for the fun yesterday with the Music classes I taught, the children are really keeping me going at the moment. One of the songs has a high-ish note some of the older boys were struggling with yesterday so one of them suggested that breathing helium might help! Another classroom became really stuffy so I opened a window, to see three seagulls on the rail of the bridge outside watching us. The children thought that was really funny, and even funnier when four more seagulls arrived, so they sang the whole song to the seagulls! A whole new meaning to 'for the birds'?